Part Three of How NOT To Travel With Children – The Flight

I travelled to the UK solo with both boys, and I’ve already posted about our journey from preparation to take off, so just how o you travel with children on the flight?  The remaining 7 hours spread before us, vapid amounts of time to fill, and I was doubtful of any shut eye happening for anyone.  Luckily for me I was wrong… but still lets visit the plane journey.

5 minutes into the flight: Lollipop-gate had been averted and the TV stand pulled up.  The toddlers listeners (his Kakoo Penguin Ear Phones) were installed with Toy Story playing.  The baby was content and looking around.  Peace.

I dare to try and put on a film of my own – The Second Best Exotic Marigold Hotel.

8 minutes into the flight: The listeners are out.  I put them back on.  The next 10 minutes are spent grappling with the listeners until I give in.  The toddler out stubborns me and continues to watch Toy Story with no sound.

21 minutes into the flight: I restart The Second Best Exotic Marigold Hotel

24 minutes into the flight: The Toddler decides he wants to watch Frozen WITH the listeners.

33 minutes into the flight: I restart The Second Best Exotic Marigold Hotel

35 minutes into the flight: Baby Boy does a (in the words of the Toddler) mega poo.  I debate for 5 minutes on whether to attempt to take 2 of them to the tiny plane toilets.  I decide against it and ask the stewardess to watch the toddler.

46 minutes into the flight: Baby Boy is changed and we are back in our seats.  Lunch is served to the toddler.

He eats the cake.

I decide against restarting The Second Best Exotic Marigold Hotel.

51 minutes into the flight: My food arrives.  Pasta.  Easy to eat with one hand and I get to shovel it down while the toddler is occupied and Baby Boy is happy looking around.

1 hour into the flight: Requests for the window start again.  Distract him with the DVD Player and feel like I’m winning again.

Restart The Second Best Exotic Marigold Hotel

1 hour 4 minutes into the flight: The kids in the row behind start to kick off.  Feel smug that the toddler is so well behaved.

1 hour 4 minutes and 30 seconds into the flight: The toddler joins in with the crying and kicking off, back to window gate.

hour 4 minutes and 45 seconds into the flight: Not to be left out Baby Boy starts to wail.

1 hour 12 minutes into the flight: Peace is restored and Room on the Broom is playing.  Baby Boy is asleep.  I feel less smug.

And more inclined to hit the wine.

1 hour 34 minutes into the flight: Broom has finished.  The toddlers quest for the window resumes.  I put the baby down in the skycot and request the help of the stewardess again. Off we trot to the toilet with a window in. Nappy changed and window lust satisfied.

1 hour 41 minutes into the flight: Get back to the seat and see that Baby Boy is once again wide awake.

1 hour 43 Minutes into the flight: I restart The Second Best Exotic Marigold Hotel

1 hour 48 minutes into the flight: The toddler starts to get tired.  Feeling hopeful I set him up with pillow and blanket.

1 hour 49 minutes into the flight: Pillow and blanket end up on the floor

1 hour 51 minutes into the flight: I put Planes 2 on the DVD Player and hope that it will buy me an hours peace and start to feed Baby Boy.

1 hour 57 minutes into the flight: I glance down and see one fast asleep toddler.  I retrieve the blanket and drape it over the toddler. Glance down again and realise a miracle has happened and Baby Boy is still asleep

2 hours into the flight: I restart The Second Best Exotic Marigold Hotel

3 hours 59 minutes into the flight: I finish The Second Best Exotic Marigold Hotel

4 hours 2 minutes into the flight: Feel like it’s all going well and feel a bit put out that we haven’t used our fantastic travel kit from KenziBox yet.  Consider waking the toddler.

4 hours 2 minutes 30 seconds into the flight: Dismiss this as a stupid idea.  Consider the same with Baby Boy. Immediately dismiss that.

4 hours 5 minutes into the flight: After a pleasant few minutes browsing the film selection,  whilst willing the child who was sat next to us to stop crying and to go back to sleep both for his parents sanity and to keep the toddler awake, I realise I haven’t heard of any other of the latest release.  This is what being a parent does to you.

4 hours and 6 minutes into the flight: After an internal struggle to choose between Legally Blonde and High School The Musical I go for High School Musical.

Got to love a bit of cheesy Zac Effron.

4 hours and 12 minutes into the flight: The toddler decides enough is enough with the film watching and wakes up demanding to sit on my knee. Slight problem that the baby is already there. Dilemma. Do I risk transferring the baby to the skycot and hope he sleeps or do I squash them both in my lap?

4 hours and 16 minutes into the flight: Feeling smug.

One baby in skycot. One Toddler back asleep on my knee. Zac Effron crooning “I’m Flying” at me.

Peace reigns.

4 hours and 45 minutes into the flight: Peace destroyed. Both boys awake. Zac Effron never made it to the end of the audition.

4 hours and 46 minutes into the flight: Toddler demands entertaining. I am very excited to get out my KenziBox On the Go pack and start to set up the velvet colouring activity

4 hours and 51 minutes into the flight: I’m set up, baby boy is bouncing on my knee and the Toddler is about to select his first colour with care.

Then the lovely stewardess asks if we want our face painted.

Of course we want our face painted.

The felt tips go flying (how appropriate) and the Toddler makes a beeline for the back of the plane.

*feel thankful that the plane is contained*

5 hours and 21 minutes into the flight: Return triumphant to our seats, no longer a little boy but now a TIGER GRRRRRRR.

With a bag of biscuits to boot.

5 hours and 33 minutes into the flight: After happily nibbling on biscuits take on the velvet colouring task.

Feed baby boy.

Look at the clock and realise I’ve nearly gone and done it.

5 hours and 41 minutes into the flight: For the next 45 minutes fight a losing battle of keeping everyone contained and happy

*realise shouldn’t congratulate myself too soon*

6 hours and 33 minutes into the flight: We slowly begin to descend.

Baby Boy is crying. And does intermittently until we land. He is only quiet when I have forced boob in his mouth. Which he takes for 39 seconds before realising crying is more fun.

The Toddler terror is also sobbing, but this is heart wrenching as he keeps saying

mummy my ears hurt

And of course I don’t have a lollipop for him this time.

Try my best to soothe both boys.

7 hours into the flight: Landed.

Next stage getting through customs. Persuade the Toddler riding piggy back is fun and load up to go……

And yes, the majority of this post was composed 40,000ft in the air.