What do you do if England’s lands AREN’T green and pleasant?

Grass.  England’s green and pleasant land.

Except, it’s not always green, and the grass isn’t always pleasant.  As we discovered this summer when we stayed with my mum during the unprecedented heatwave.  As we watched satellite maps of the UK turn from green to murky brown and the boys rolled around in the garden at my mums complaining that it was itchy.  I got to wondering whether grass was worth the bother.

I mean sure, green grass looks pretty, but if it’s anything like my mum’s house it isn’t even grass.  It’s moss with the occasional blade and weed poking through.  That’s not to say that my mum doesn’t look after her garden, she does.  It’s just from years of wild seeds being blown in from next door has destroyed the grass.

Tesco School Uniform #everylittlehelps

You can see when you look, the dried patches, the moss, the lawn that really requires some TLC.

Not to mention the fact having two tearaways who want to run, dig it up, find buried treasure, play football, is also playing havoc on the poor grass.

But what could we do about it?

We have been discussing this all summer, Mum and I, as she gets her garden ready for winter and the boys descending once again.  This time with three boys rather than a two.  About what she is doing, and wants to do.

She’s had decking replaced, gravel laid, and we came back once again to the issue of the grass.

She loves the grass, the boys love the grass, I love the grass.  A garden isn’t really a garden if it’s not green now is it.

We discussed whether it would be a good idea to lay down turf but came to the conclusion the same issue would happen again and again.  The wild seeds would blow over.  The moss would creep in.  And sooner or later we’d be back where we started.  Mossy grass.

We thought about getting it levelled and a patio laid.  But then remembered we actually really like grass.  Plus it’s not so great when the kids come to visit and throw themselves around.

We talked about the fact that she gave her lawnmower to my brother as cutting the grass aggravates her hayfever and gets someone in to do it.  And the “flowers” that poke through the ground.

Then we finally got onto the subject of artificial grass.  The kind that you can hose down, hoover and generally look outside and remember you are in England’s green and pleasant lands again.  We debated whether the weeds that had taken hold would force their way through again and having researched how Wonderlawn install artificial grass that it shouldn’t be an issue.

At the moment that seems to be the front runner, the football pitch for the boys to play on, the green grass for my mum to sit on when the sun is out.

That said she still has to actually make up her mind and pick up the phone to book… still it’s a while until next summer!

 

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