She believed she could…

…but once the kids were in bed she couldn’t be arsed so she didn’t.

Story of my life.

Each morning I wake up full of grand ideas and big plans. Starting the day with an upbeat affirmation and a fierce determination.

Yes, each morning I’m definitely of the she believed she could and she did persuasion.  And I do.  Kind of.

Then the day goes on, and on, and on.  And then on a little bit more.

The incessant need that your children have, even when they aren’t with you.  How you are always switched on even when you don’t think you are.

Then you wrestle the little angels down to sleep, head downstairs and.

Nothing

I sit in front of the TV.  Mindlessly watching Friends re-runs.  Gormlessly scrolling through Facebook.  Opening my mouth to speak to my husband and forgetting what I was about to say.

All the grand plans I’d made of things to do when the kids were asleep?

Forgotten.

You won’t find me creating the latest gourmet recipe as featured on Tasty; though you would find me aimlessly scrolling through said videos with my tummy rumbling.

No you won’t find me putting pen to paper and creating the next viral blog post that would see me shoot to fame on This Morning.  But you might find me avidly reading through mumsnet AIBU

You probably wouldn’t find me debating the finer points of life with my husband, but you would find me sat next to him commenting on said mindless re-run of Friends.  And by commenting I mean both of us quoting the lines before they happen.

No.

The fact of the matter is that whatever grand plans I cook up each morning, by the time the kids go to bed I am done.  Spent.

Some nights that means ordering pizza and slobbing out.  Others it means pouring a glass of wine to wind down.  Sometimes it’s raiding the chocolate with the latest trashy novel.

Quite simply most nights, I cannot be arsed.

And so I don’t.

And that’s OK.

I definitely believe I can, I know I can, and one day.  I will.  Just not today.

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